24 hours later.

I wrote this last night.

I guess I am feeling low today.

I went to pick up Grace from school and had a typical day go to a bizarre day in the blink of an eye.

My friend Kate knows how every day when we pick up the kids we hold our breath. Did everything go well? Will they be there on time? and so on.

Well, today i waited

and waited. Starting to worry.

A woman I don't know comes out calling for LIsa Kulp.

.............

What happened now. Grace was with her favorite teacher and crying. Not good.

Heading toward the bathroom. Really not good.

Mrs. Rolek tells me she's been here a while. Oh so ok. We've had this trouble before.

I let her go a while then try to get her out, figuring she was done/ No. Not yet. 

Ok.

Wait. Try again. Grace school is over, its time to go home. Ok... NO

Now it's 3:30. She is still feeling she has to go.

But it's over now. NO

3:40 What do I do? Don't you want to go home? NO

3:45 I text Mrs Rolek and ask what time she went in, didn't she say 2:30?!!!!!

She's been in the bathroom for an hour???? She doesn't stay this long at home!

I used the visual timer. NO

Finally, I KNOW she is done and I just sweep her up and move her out.

Finally, in the car.

Finally, going home.

I took her home and let her soak in the tub. I think she really wasn't feeling well. She was in the tub for a long time.

______

Why is it that I can't even figure out what my child needs or how she feels.

Parents of Autism go thorough things that parents of typical children never would. 

When was the last time you found yourself in a public bathroom with your child  for 1/2 hour?

And they are all different so we all have our own special experiences.

Maybe that's why I write about what happens to us.

Whenever I feel that I don't know what to do, I feel like I've failed her. I'm the mom. I'm supposed to know what to do.

But I don't. 

and it bugs me.

Why do things have to be so hard for her?'

Called the doctor and the doctor said increase dosage of exlax and myralax- call next week. 

Ok. Thank you.

But they don't tell me how to help her.

24 hours later. waiting.